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When my mom was staying at the P.T. place a nurse came in and explained how they have many activity's she could join, such as bingo,movie night and quiz night. I asked mom if she would be doing any of these. She said "why would I do those here when I don't do them at home " I said because you don't have those activity's down the hall in your house.
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My grandmother, years ago. She was about 90. I was sitting with her and my sister the day after another sister had gotten married. Grandma said to my sister, "you were such a beautiful bride yesterday". There was an awkward pause as the bride was not the sister she was talking to. My sister finally said, "Grandma, I am Susie. Mary got married yesterday." Without missing a beat my Grandmother said, "well if you girls came around a little more often, I'd be able to tell you apart". Touche, Grandma, touche.

I will say current funny, when my MIL talks about the llama-like creatures she has seen in our backyard, I just have to bite my cheek to keep from laughing.
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As an add on to my previous story, I should have explained that Mum often got her words mixed up - and after the laughter (which, bless her, she didn't understand) died down, the procedure continued, with Mum adding "I hope you do abominations young man - because I mean what I say" !!
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This was just what the Dr. ordered - haven't laughed this much in ages. Thanks for all your stories - I have one too - usually when the family gets together Mom(Nana) gets the last word on the TV programming and is generally not too happy if there's an important game on that the fellows just can't miss. Last Christmas someone put the Nativity story on while I was in the kitchen preparing dinner - and suddenly Nana spoke up and said quite loudly, "This program is boring - why don't we watch something Christmassy?"
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Thank you so much for asking this question !! I laughed so much - what a relief !!
My story is of when my (then) 82 year old Mum when to hospital to have a 'ring' fitted as an outpatient due to a prolapsed womb which was causing problems with her waterworks.
Firstly she refused point blank to have the procedure done unless myself and my sister were with her as the doctor looked like 'he should still be in nappies' ! We obliged and were positioned either side of her, holding her hands, and all was going well until she suddenly shouted "Stop, Stop - I feel like I'm having an organism - and I don't want another baby at my age !!" Well, after a few seconds of stunned silence, everyone in the room burst into laughter (including the frosty-faced doctor).
Mum died the end of January and I miss her so much. It's so good that the happy and funny memories are starting to take over from the misery. I need and appreciate this site for all that you do.
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My mom just got out of a week of PT after being in the hospital for a week due to C.O.P.D Exacerbation. She told me not to tell people she had that because it sounds like a bad word.
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OMG - this post should come with a laughter ahead warning! I almost spilled my coffee on my laptop, I'm laughing so hard. Here4her, Cricket, and LindaMS thanks for making my day starting with laughter.

My mom isn't funny per se, but has just the best hallucinations. She's Lewy Body Dementia. When she first moved into IL, she said a cat had come into her apt. Then again a couple of weeks later, then again... Kitty just sat over in the corner, no food, no petting, just was there very matter of fact. Her apt was 3rd floor in a corner by emergency stairs. So after kitty #3, I walked her floor and the apt's right below her to ask about who's kitty it could be. Well no pets allowed except on ground floor of IL. Hallucination. A couple of months later, a bunny appeared in the same corner twice. But this time, she was po'd because bunnies are supposed to leave candy and a basket. Got to love what dementia does to the brain.
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The PT came to see Mom at hospice yesterday and while the PT was giving Mom exersizes to do, she told the PT, "Ok, you can go now."
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Last week was a rough week with mom, she had fallen...took her to the doc and a sore on her toe was infected. My sis and I had her soak her foot and we were looking thru her first aid kit. I found an antiseptic wipe. My sister who has not drank in 4 years said, that is probably just an alcohol wipe..as she walked away our mom said, "I don't drink, only you do that!" We both laughed and we needed that laugh after the week we just went through, Lol!!
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Our last name is "Gettys"-(pronounced Get-ees). One day the phone rang and my mom, who is hard of hearing answered it. The caller said "May I speak to Ms. Gettys?". My mom yells back at her--"No I haven't eaten spaghetti ! Its just now time for breakfast!"
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My 97 year old Mom is deaf in one ear and her "good" ear isn't much better. She calls me on the phone asking how to use her remote control to turn on the TV. I explain how to hold it and where the power button is. She asks," you want me to push the bicycle wheel?" No, Mom the power button in the upper right corner. "All I see is a bicycle wheel." Are you looking at the remote? "Yes!" She is getteing very frustrated with me at this point and I'm thinking she is not hearing me. She keeps saying bicycle wheel, I keep trying to get her to push the button. Finally, I say, "OK push the bicycle wheel". Boom the TV comes blaring on. I guess the power button looks like a bicycle wheel! Whatever works!
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I got a call from the plumber; my mom called them and is demanding they put her old garbage disposal back in....it was 40 yrs old, quit 4 months ago and we had it replaced at that time....She said the new one is broken and doesn't work (its quiet and she can't hear it).
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Mom saw one of her NA at hospice and told him, "hey stop scratching." He was scratching his butt.
She told her RN, "you're beautiful." The CNA jokingly asked, "aren't I beautiful too?" Mom told her, "if I said that I would be lying."
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Yesterday my mother asked me how I met my father, and if I'd known him before he married her...
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My mom won't take meds and is paranoid about any foods that are not microwaeable. She awakened me and told me to go down the hall to the freezer and get everything out of it and put it in the refrigerator in the kitchel. Then she said, I'll do it. I sad 'Mom there is nothing down there except for heavy frozen meats for my brother's dog. Those things are heavy." She said "then you go get it, that's why i woke you up." This was a good day!!! Blessings....
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that she is seriously concerned about my mental health because it is clear that I need help. that she doesn't have dementia or concern of Alzheimer's.. that I am the one with that has Alzheimer's..
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We start out as babies...live our life and go back to being babies before death. The circle of life. I have laughed and cried with mom....She loves to argue..should have been an attorney. She will NOT give up no matter what..always has been that way. But sadly, she was usually 99% of the time, wrong. Still, when she does something like what you just described, I laugh and then she laughs because I'm laughing. It's MUCH better than her arguing all the time!
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The X-ray tech came into my mom's room to take a chest x-ray. He placed the film behind her back, and placed the machine at the foot of her bed and told her to take a deep breath, she said, "should I smile", we all laughed!
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I went to visit my Dad and it was 11:00 am, he wasn't up yet. He had just buzzed the girls to get him up. He asked me,"Were you in here a minute ago?"
I said,"No, I just got here." He said, "I was laying here and heard a voice, it kind of sounded like Mom(my mom not his). She said,"what the He## are you still doing in bed! So I pressed my button for the girls to help me get up." It was pretty funny, I don't know how many times I heard my Mom yell that down the hallway when I was still living at home.
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I took my mom for a Mamagram and she said to the Tech, can you believe these boobs used to be my husbands toys! The Tech and I had a good laugh!
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This is about a customer who suffers from early stages of dementia. Thought I'd share it here. I am a hairdresser, I was giving the woman a perm for the first time. She was recommended to me because she had just broken a hip and hadn't had her hair done in a while and I get it...that she repeats etc..
So I was going through the consultation to get an idea of her hair type, perm history etc. I said "your hair is nice and thick but it is very straight", she responded..." the only curl hair I have, is between my legs." It is funny that we all worry about curbing our mouths, at work, not to say anything inappropriate out of respect, but the biggest "gutter mouths" are the elders. I love them, they are for real !!!! I've got to start writing a book.
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Well My Father in Law who is in the early stages of dementia was riding with my oldest son, when they passed a strip club and he told my son he eats breakfast their every morning. My son didn't know what to say!
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My brother and I were talking about a man all the family knew one day and my Dad all of a sudden pipes in an says yeah, that man is a lesbian.
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I take my mom to the mall for a walk everyday. She always tells me "if you keep doing this you're never going to get rid of me!" My standard reply is "thanks for the warning."
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See your funny thing your parent said on Facebook! More to come...

http://www.facebook.com/AgingCare

Thanks LindaMS!!!
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My Mom said to me this morning before breakfast Do I have to go to school today? And I just smiled and said yes after breakfast we will go to school. I gave her a bath and about an hour later I asked her if she felt better now that her shower is over and she said to me oh that lady was nice to me. I've learned to enjoy those moments with her because its that moment that counts. Take Care everyone!!
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My mother, Shirley, has a wicked sense of humour which rarely shows itself these days. Sue, her neighbour, comes over every day to help out with meals, etc., and the conversation went as follows:-

Sue...."How are you Shirley?"

Shirley..."I'm a bit worried about finding new lumps on my knees."

Sue..."Oh? What are they?"
[drum roll]

Shirley..."My boobs."
That cracked me up!
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I just want to thank LindaMS for asking this question and everyone for posting. It is so refreshing to hear the funny stuff for a change. Many of us caregivers are so weighed down with emotional hardships and we rarely get away and this question and thread is such a pleasure for us!
*´¨)
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(¸.•´ (¸.•` ¤ Chirp Chirp Cricket Hugsღ
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Before my dad died he was at home on Hospice. I was staying with him and mom. His sister came to visit and had gotten a new hair style (very long over due) . When she asked my dad how he liked her hair he said " It's nice, I like bushy things " My aunt was there with my cousin and I guess dad was getting tired because he whispered loud to me " tell them they can leave now " .
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What a novel idea, to keep a record of funny things they say and do. Maybe also the dangerous events. That way when the unconcerned relatives visit (if they ever do) you'd have a record. They could laugh with you about the funny things and be aware thats its not a joke to take care of "our" relative.
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