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he he, good to see you kept your fun sense of humor Boni !! Those edible arrangements are fun and pretty but full of sugar!!! Scrape off the chocolate...least it's a start, right? ;)

Did my time with those xanex during my divorce. Was up to 5 a day, or 2 1/2 bars... man oh man was those things the devil to get off of!! Thought I was going to DIE for a week and that was with tapering down. Never ever EVER again!!

Some people just have the genetic makeup to do/eat/;drink and take whatever they want and live to a ripe old age. One just never knows!

Have I mentioned lately how much I love my caregiver helper? If not, I LOVE HER! She french braided mom's hair so lovely today... such a kind loving woman.
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look at poor junior junior . hes wondering why his other g - pa passed away and hes left with this malignancy on societys a** . ..
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looks like i take 0.5's but more like popping skittles if skittles were ingested sublingually .
honestly , you might need em to get you thru moms decline but if doc tries to wean you off after 6 months dont be surprised . trust me i work for a doc .
( well i cut his firewood )
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Capt...0.25 twice a day. that's low, right?
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brilliant . 5 gallons of slurry in the fridge . i could drink it with a long tygon hose .
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Somebody sent me a beautiful edible arrangement. They must have heard of the heart attack, but not the diabetes. There are Chocolate covered strawberries that are FREAKIN Killing me!
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Capn, fire up your drill and put a sharp edge on the paint stirrer and bingo, you have a blender. a BIG blender.
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i need a blender . i used to blend up a quart of canned tomatoes and drink them when i had no appetite . the energy would flow thru my body till sparks flew from my fingertips . thats about where im at . cooking for oneself can , at a point , take more energy than the energy derived from the meal . i dont care about meal preperation , id blend up anything and drink it down ..
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My inlaws ate so healthy and old habits did hard. Recently, one of the grandkids saw the faux butter at my 93 yo FIL's and said "Grandad, you eat whatever you want. Now you can put half and half on your oatmeal." I swear if I did everything the nutritionist told me to (no salt, very little red meat, etc. etc.) my husband would be at IHop. Better to seek balance and common sense.
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boni , zans are addictive as fire . read some blogs from addicts . the anxiety that you were trying to medicate becomes intensified in the absence of zans and like any drug require ever increasing amounts or different means of ingesting them . i dissolve them under my tongue three at a time . ive abused 60 of em a month for 8 years . now i need them to feel normal . thats not good ..
linda, i was just talking to the 83 yr old man upstairs . after a bout of gout he was told that everything was bad for him . this guy is the picture of good health and takes no meds at all . i dont think hes going to give up anything ..
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Boni, when my husband was given the "you can't have salt ,fat, sugar etc." speech after his heart attack, he told the nutritionist whiskey was ok then. She didn't crack a smile.....
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Jeezaloo! I'm glad you laughed capt! I was beginning to think I had left my comic relief edge in the ICU. New comers might even think I'm a little nuts. Well, I am, but thats besides the point.
They just put me on zans. I will take as directed and be aware of the addictive effects. Giving up cigarettes and sweets might trigger a new addiction. I need to find a healthy one fast as a prevention. Man, I wish I still liked sex. sigh.
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bluntmans gonna be on here in10 more years squealing like a stuck hog about the crap he has to put up with .
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lol , boni . just saw your post . i do need someone to keep me straightened out but im difficult , marinated in belligerance , chilled , dredged in control freak , then oven fried in h*ll. i build sh*t then dont have the energy to clean up the aftermath . a one person disaster zone . eating fried pork , smoking tobacco and drinking pvc glue a**water . booze and tramadol are out . trying to taper off the zans , may need professional help with that . getting old blows ..
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i dont have pain or a scrip for either drug , just a supply and the tendancy to abuse them . young people get by with that , were not young anymore . i would like to change occupations tho . the challenge is gone . i keep longingly checking out the kitchen at ednas nh but im not interested in being abused for 12 hours a day . eh , 6 more years of rock pounding and wood cutting and i can get ss anyway . just have to play it by ear . it looks like the renter might be boxing up things to move out . she has a disabled daughter she could live with and nanny for . i can go either way on that one . i could live in that beautiful upstairs and pay 174 . 00 a month . the bunker is nice enough to rent to a single person but more likely my son bluntman . none of us can predict one day in advance only try to keep our options open . my only regret on the renter was putting up with her yapping dogs and their stench for 9 months before i lost my cool . it was the most miserable 9 months of my life to date .
wine can be made with any recipe. the pressure canner only distilled it into 150 proof shine .
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Bob, you bring out the care giver in me as much as my Mom, kids, grand kids or anyone else I love.
How I would love to come to IN, put you to bed, cook you healthy, YUMMY meals, take care of your aches and pains, and dole out your meds.

Unfortunately....... you are such a major horn dog, that once you saw how hot I am, you would be much to hard to handle. Oh well. ;)
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I sympathize I hate water too, it seems to burn on the way down. better if it's not too cold. have you tried a splash of lemon in it? Trouble when I don't drink enough my skin looks like it needs ironing. I guess you know what you have to do about the meds. if you get anxious without the Zanax could they increase the dose and you discipline your self. Things like tramadol are easy to abuse. Do you actually have enough pain to really need it? Maybe try some thing else if the pain is really bad. i am assuming it is joints and back from all the rock pounding. can you find an apprentice to do the heavy. would you care to shre the recipe for distilling in the pressure canner not that am allowed to drink much these days. We used to make some wicked wine when we lived in Scotland. all kinds of fruits that we grew outselves. elderberry champayne was paricularily good.
my health was pretty good untill I retired at 68 then all the problems reared their ugly heads and I get in trouble for refusing some of the advice and investigations. Why find out if there is nothing you are going to do about it and the darn medicine might poison me anyway. I told one very nice lady dr this morning she could describe me as "an elderly non complient retired RN"
.
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countrymouse,
i usedta make and bottle wine but after learning to distill it in my pressure canner i never bottled any more up , only made 151 brandy .
not a good hobby for me . doc said my kidney numbers only recently showed up high . thats bs . my va data online has shown elevated kidney readings since a failed interferon treatment 7 yrs ago . i called the nurse telling her my kidneys hurt just a couple days before the treatment was aborted . i should have drank considerably more water during this last treatment but i was never told why , only to drink plenty of water . i still dont drink enough of the crap . haveta find some kind of solution for that and start eating more properly too . more immediately i think i have a zan addiction going on . i scarf em down two weeks a month then dont feel like i need em the remainder of the month . im not embarrassed about it , its one more thing i have to fix . doc dont know ive been abusing tramadol either . ill bet my kidney readings will look much better in december . i stopped to talk to a 71 yr old friend this am about his lifestyle . charlie is probably the oldest hippie i know . hes quite healthy , has given up all but a couple puffs of weed a day and doing quite well .. MOST old people give up their vices but not one dam minute before theyre forced to ..
im just realizing when i dont have zans i get agitated . not visibly but physically . the liver hates stress more than any other organ so it gets pissed . duh . it requires zans to get to normal -- the very definition of an addiction ..
try terminal dementia caregiving for 6 yrs without some kind of crutch and let me know how that goes . lol . thats why im not embarassed to discuss the matter ..
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Well done freqflyer. hope tomorrow goes well too.
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My parents are scheduled to see an Elder Law Attorney tomorrow morning to get their Wills updated or to draw up a Trust, update their POA's, etc.

Dad called me this afternoon saying Mom doesn't want to go.... she wants to keep her Will the same [oh dear, that Will is a landmine it's so out of date].... so I went over to their house....

Turned out Mom thought tomorrow was the signing of the new Wills without her input.... Mom didn't realize it was an initial meeting just to chat with the attorney [Dad tends to fail to talk these things over with her].... once she realized she won't be signing any papers she was willing to go.... WHEW !!

If it wasn't for this website, I would have had a huge hissy fit, but I kept my cool :)
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Captain are you interested in brewing? With all of your cookery skills it might be a fun and healthy new hobby for you. A pint of mild, at only around 2 or 3%, is barely alcoholic and can be superb. *Packed* with B vitamins! (as I tell myself comfortingly) You could easily grow hops, too… Endless possibilities.

It would be astonishing if your poor kidneys weren't complaining after all they've been through - did they say anything about what kind of damage and whether it's reversible?
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dam, our various concerns seem trivial compared to the ebola story on der spiegal online tonight . this virus kills in a matter of days . tobacco and greasy french fries wont kill me for several more years .
i have a construction friend who had a heart attack a couple of years ago . he was flown to indy , had bypass surgery and was back home in his own bed in a matter of 24 or so hours . medicine is sure changing . our local hospital has hardly any inpatients now. in fact the third floor is a makeshift dementia institution . too many years we kept building hospitals for the sake of job creation till the system became unsustainable .. equally good medical care can be provided in a dam army tent and has been in the past and present . i still say indy va is the future of medicine . go directly to blood draw , the analyzed results will be on your docs pc in 45 minutes or less . there is no guesswork , all BLOOD work .. prescriptions are ready for pickup in the pharmacy in a matter of ten minutes after doc visit is over . must be a lot of malcontents up there bucking for ptsd disabilities tho . ive seen the va police force grow from one man 15 years ago to a force of 15 - 20 officers now . every now and then some clown will come cruising down a hallway yelling all kinds of conspiracy crap . two unamused officers arent usually but a few paces behind him .
its sad when my life is so boring that a va visit becomes a social event for a day .. meh . still better than popcorn and movies. bletchhh ..
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BoniChak, I know how you feel. I remember back 5 years ago after having cancer surgery and leaving the hospital the next day to go home to someone who was totally clueless about taking care of anyone......

How I wished I was back in the hospital [decades ago one would stay 7 days in the hospital after major surgery... today it's out-patient].... one could heal quicker staying in the hospital [yes, I know, more risk of catching something], there were professionals changing your bandages, someone cooking 3 good meals, someone cleaning, and always someone stopping by from the hospital team. At home, if you are a woman, you are pretty much on your own. Thank goodness my sig other didn't say "what's for dinner?" the day I came home :P
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on a good note , edna is in good spirits. we sat today and played with her small handful of foreign coins and the two gold dollars i took her . i knew we needed something to play with , thats why i got the dollars for her . those jerks are still not going to let us go anywhere . i believe shes been physically conserved because her daughter is too ill to take care of her .. its a shame . with slightly different timing i would have proudly been her domestic partner at her shack in the hills . it was always the plan in the back of my mind but edna moved to indep lvng three yrs ago .. its ok i guess . shes well liked and cared for at nh and i probably deserve to live in my shack at this point too . just wish she could visit and groove on the fireplace with me . she loves a fireplace . i think she still remembers it from last winter . we were looking at pc pics when she chuckled that the fire kept captivating her eyes . she tried to give me a gold dollar today . after all she has two . thats how she is .. very content and non - material ..
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yea we all have scary concerns and rightfully so . we,ll all live to our 80.s but not without a variety of health snafu,s . my mother and now my aunts written prognoses, would have been simpler to list the things that werent wrong with them . bad heart , diabetes , dementia , fatty liver , poor kidney function , etc .
i dont think my kidney function is terrible veronica . the letters are the va,s way of making us take some responsibility . i just do not drink much water . sitting here swilling some right now i can see why . this tastes like a combination of assrot and pvc glue ..
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I'm just flat out tired of 'stress'... Perhaps a lobotomy would help(?)... just kidding... but, working on getting rid of it... [all]..
:)
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Boni you are just reacting to no longer being the center of attention in the hospital. You had a brief respite from giving your all to mother and suddenly all the drama and excitement have gone and you are faced with getting back to a new normal. it is like the let down after you have had a baby just don't get pregnant again!!!

Capt you only recently lost your mom and before you had time to really grieve took on your aunt and now that will also soon be over. that leaves you with no elders in your like you are the top rock on the pile and it's lonely up there.
How bad did the VA say your kidneys are ? Good idea to give all up all your vices. start with the pills and booze. Are they talking dialysis or just trying to frighten you into a healthier life? Lots of things to consider but start by the obvious ones.
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constantnurse, same here. Worked this morning, then went for back x-rays on myself, then stopped at the grocery store to pick up items my Mom needed but Dad had forgotten to put on the main grocery list.... and, as usual, my parents want me to sit and chat.

I usually stand in the kitchen for 10 minutes chatting then I need to leave.... I know my parents hadn't talked to anyone else but each other, and Mom is hard of hearing now, but I am just too tired.... plus their home is way too hot which makes it hard for me to catch my breath. I hate to chat and run.

If only they would have moved into that beautiful retirement community just down the road.... [sigh]
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Sorry Cap... maybe this is all just a giant wake up call? That and of course Monday :/ oh... let's not forget the worse 3 months in the calendar.

((((hugs))))

Boni, take back what you said!!!
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I am picking up mom and dads prescriptions on my way home from work. That and other groceries they might need. feeling a bit like an overwhelmed pack mule. just tired tonight.... busy day at work, then have to take groceries to mom and dad. they always want me to stay and visit for a while. So hard to say no.....
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