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Thanks everyone for your thoughts.. it surely does help that I (and my sister) are not alone. Oh really, I didn't know they had phones in the nursing home too. Oh boy...
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Even if she can have her own phone, aren't you the one who pays for it?
When my cousin was in a NH, there was one phone, in the lobby, for patient use.
It wasn't very convent for patients to make frequent calls.
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That's what I thought, they didn't supply a phone automatically, you would have to pay for one.
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Your situation sounds almost exactly like mine. My mother was in a rehab for 2 weeks and acted so badly they finally asked me to take her home. However, she has been diagnosed with dementia from a MRI of her brain. Along with dementia she has a fear of unfamiliar places. When she was back home again she very slowly returned to the way she was before rehab. Don't know if this will happen with your mom. I would suggest defiantly have her tested for dementia. Hope this helps
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Well I hope she returns to the way she was before going into the rehab as I found out today she may be released in 10 days! Who knew???? Before I was worrying about her dying and/or being permanent there, now I have to get ready for her to come home. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.
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Mom is supposed to becoming home in ten days if all goes well. I was very surprised with news. This evening nurse called saying because they are treating for pnemonia with antibiotics they think she now has c Diff. Hopefully all that will get under control. Trying to line up my help for when mom gets court.
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You might want to see if she is eligible for Home Health to start with. The nurses and therapists could be helpful in getting you set up.
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Start talking to the discharge folks about what she's eligible for when she's discharged.
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I've been researching all the help for months.. There isn't any clear cut help that is free. Everything is a waiting list or tons of paperwork, and it amounts to a few hours a few times a week. If you need 24/7 you'd have to have 10 different people coming and going in your house. I looked at the recommendation of Home Health. All I see is it's a free agency that helps you find help you have to pay for.
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Talk to the discharge people. If yhe doctor writes a script for it, it's covered by Medicare.
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really? I didn't know that Thanks so much
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thank so much for that information. Will inquire tomorrow
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Mom seems soooo depressed. I told her she's almost done with therapy and she doesn't seem excited, or at the very least, pleased that she will be going home. She talks about dying all the time and getting out of there. I though telling her she's almost ready to leave would change her mood, but it hasn't. I wonder if I am doing the right thing bringing her home. I asked her what is that you want, to get out of there and go home or just die? I just don't know how to help her any more and her attitude and mood is making me second-guess my plans to bring her home.
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The fact that you're surprised that your Mom could be discharged within 10 days, is concerning. If your assessment of your Mom's condition is that her care in her current state is more than you can handle at home, push back. Have a meeting with the social worker. Explain exactly what level of care you can give (do you have to work, do you have any physical limitations yourself...etc...). Unless you push back and advocate for yourself in this process, they'll just load her in your car and wish you good luck!
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I do work full time. I was told mom can walk with her walker, but it's her attitude that is the biggest problem. I had a paid helper from Senior Helpers coming in 5 hours a day while I was at work, but I will need more help I feel this time around. I am paying $19 an hour and the helper told me she was only getting $8.75 for her time at my house. That in itself makes me sick. I am hoping to hire some more help either through a website that advertises caregivers or through a friend that works at a AL facility and recommended someone that needs work. I really want someone to be here at night while I sleep so they can keep an eye on mom and help when she needs to go too the bathroom. I am wanting about 18 hours of help a day. I really don't want to lose my life helping mom to be able to stay at home with me.
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Cheryl, this is only going to get worse. If your mom is in a facility, you can be a loving daughter who visits her and advocates for her. Was in exactly this situation two years ago. Mom is much better cared for by the professionals.
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ba8alou.. I have a feeling you are right, but I am going to give it one last try... even if only last a month. This is my last effort to make mom happy, but if something else happens that she is sent to the hospital, no more for me.
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I won't have ANY REGRETS after this last try.
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Cheryl, I so respect your trying this. What have your mom's hospitalizations been for? Does she fall? Get utis or other infections? The fact that she's got fluid in her lungs, dementia, intermittently wants to die is an indication that she's become quite frail. Does she want to live this way? Is she currently on antidepressant therapy? Talk frankly with her doc and discharge staff. And then follow your gut. Godspeed!
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I just searched with a question and got this site. I have read the comments and they sound pretty much like what I am going through.
My mom recently began having Dementia (forgetting things, repeating things, etc.) She is 85 years old and lives by herself. She is very independent and has done everything around her house on her own. She even cut the acre of grass she has, when my husband didn't get there before her. She is very strong willed.
About 1 month ago, she tripped indoors and broke her humus bone in her left arm. They had to put her in the hospital for a week and insert a titanium rod and pins. She was supposed to go straight to rehab, but when we got there, it was horrible. She cried and cried not to be left there. Needless to say, I took her to her home and scheduled therapy to come to her. They came for a while and then ordered her to go to rehab as an outpatient. She has been once, but then her right knee caused her a lot of pain, and therefore they scheduled therapy on her right knee. Now she is saying she is tired of all this therapy mess and she will just stay at home and rot and not go anywhere. Here's the problem. I should have never brought her home from the rehab facility. Second, the outpatient rehab is getting tired of her canceling her treatments, and thirdly, someone has to take her to all of these appointments (my sister and I have full time jobs, and my husband and I already have his dad living with us). My sister is no help at all. I live 1 and 1/2 hours away from mom. She lives 3 miles away!
Does anyone have any suggestions how I can get my mom back into the inpatient rehab facility without having to hog-tie her? I need help! Please.
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Start by call in her doctor and see if he will order it. Call the facility and see if the have a bed.
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