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How are you supposed to find this will when he dies? It sounds like you were named executor of the will, but how is this will supposed to magically appear if he dies tomorrow? How could you carry out the intentions that he stated when you can't even find the will? Dying 'without a will' is a huge probate mess. Is somebody supposed to call you on the phone and bring a will on over? Is it in his desk? Where are you supposed to look for it? Better get the secret code on where to find it. Focus on being allowed into the relationship with the attorney, somehow, so you at least know the attorney name and whether you were assigned any duties and whether a DPOA was drawn up or some kind of trust created. He might be the sole trustee of a revokable trust, yet have named successor trustees in the event of his incapacity and you would like to know that if you could. He might not want you to know that if he is paranoid that you would have him declared incapacitated so that you could become trustee.
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