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I definitely don't have time for both caregiving and dating. Simply impossible. I work every day, and after work I go to my mom's nursing home until late. My free time is to clean the house, run errands, sleep and have some rest. I can't definitely date !
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Dating is impossible. I care for my mother and getting an adult sitter is expensive and not reliable. Making plans makes Mom and God laugh. Just learning to adjust to no help and no time for me. Change is life.
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So, yeah, mykabond, my advice is just to be aware that you're in a position thats putting great demands on you emotionally/mentally/physically/spiritually and then just go with it and let Mother Nature take its course. Just because you're caregiving doesn't mean you will or won't meet someone compatible. Online dating sites are probably the way to go since we don't have any free time.
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LOL at all of your posts on here. Yeah, we're a bunch of lonely crazies... some more lonely, and some more crazy than others.

I went on my first date about a week ago since onset of full time caregiving life. I was surprised to find I'm pretty darn emotionally vulnerable in a way I wasn't expecting to be. I never thought of myself as "desperate" before but I felt that way, a little bit... it was like "please! like me! pick me! love me! I need rescuing!" Ugh. Didn't like it one bit.
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I was single and a hermit before I started caregiving. I'm still a hermit. I create little caves for solitude or I'd go nuts. And, no .. not looking. Not even remotely. Mostly, cuz at 60, I'm a set-in-my ways old dog (yeah, use THAT word in your head, it'd fit .. mostly, lol).
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dam*,
i had a dream a few months ago that had a hospice aid named chrissy or missy involved. tonight a new hospice aid named missy shows up. trippy. shes my age and cute as h*ll too. my dream was pretty uneventful. missy / chrissy, whichever was telling me my trike was parked out by the road, needed to move it . still trippy. this gal looks like the gal in my dream. thin, short hair..
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I have several friends that are men, and I still keep in contact with an old boyfriend, but I'm not out looking for a relationship. I have looked on-line at some of the dating sites, but there are so many of them, and I wouldn't know where to begin. On the other hand, if I did meet someone where things really "clicked", I would continue to go out with that person, if he were interested also.
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Oh and by the way, I thought you HATED cats and butterfies, more for the inert kind I suppose, get no lip back that way. har har
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@ madeaa, its a gold mine if your not looking for long term committment..
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Cap'n you got to stop trying to pick up girls under bridges, it's a dead end.
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Well, at least you guys helped me laugh through the day. Thank you for sharing your "adventures" and nice to know even though I feel alone I am not really alone...one day at a time right?
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i love to click thru the " lets meet " pics on the dating sites. it goes like: NO. NO. NEVER. GAAAH. NO. NO . A MILLION TIMES , NO !! seriously, its a leper colony..
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If I had time for a date...I think I would rather use it sleeping. Sad, but true.
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you gals ought to get some pics on here. granted, mine is kaiser wilhelm 11 but if you replace the green helmet with a bandana you cant tell us apart. ive been divorced and alone for 13 years. i wouldnt rule out doin a butterfly or a cat.
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I am a single, full-time caretaker for my Mom. Like daughteralone, I gave up on dating when I started this caregiver journey. I had a very active life before this; now I am recycling myself in a new role. I imagine when I can no longer do this, I will just get on with what comes next. That's what life is, a series of changes and adjustments.
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Single guy with mom, well, unless you are like Norman Bates and like stuffed things, a good woman would think highly of what you are doing for your mother, if not you're more than probably better off without her. I just want some friends to hang out with, talk with, go to movie, bike ride, just friends to enjoy, I am kinda feeling more and more like Tina Turner in "what's love got to do with it."
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Yes - but I gave up on dating a long time ago. Now I don't have that much freedom - I'd just like to be free to go out on a week-end night to see a concert or play with girlfriends! I keep telling myself I enjoyed my freedom in my own apt for many years, but now it's a different phase in my life and I have to try to enjoy whatever free time I do have without mourning too much what I've given up. And of course it will be over someday and I can resume a "normal" life I hope. I don't think anyone really gets through life without some sacrifices of our time and I guess it makes us better people in the long run.
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im available on an online dating site or two but among my other percieved dysfunctions, im pretty sure that any guy living at his mothers house is considered a bum. its a stereotype ill just have to live with , back in my new house again , eventually..
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Dating and caregiving? I think they are mutually exclusive! ;)

Seriously, it is a challenge - when is there time to develop romance if you are caring for a loved one? Almost a miracle, I'd say.
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