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My mom was deemed incapacitated at her memory care by the nurse practitioner who Treated my mom at memory care, the nurse practitioners overseeing doctor was the second doctor needed. They then supplied the document stating such..my medical POA was then active.

my MIL , took to see her Dr , with a follow up visit right after by second dr… dementia.. they deemed her incapacitated…

we live in Wisconsin
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It's very simple. You have to show in Court, convincing evidence that the person to be declared incompetent suffers from an incurable medical condition that impairs his/her judgement and though-processes required to administer properly his/her financial and personal affairs. Medical experts opinions are frequently used. The person to be declared incompetent is entitled to defend himself/herself and prove that the accusation is wrong.
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It is a doctor with the diagnosis that will state that a person is no longer competent.
With that in writing you can, hopefully with an Elder Care Attorney, petition to become this person Guardian.
This is not an easy task and can be time consuming as well as expensive for the Ward. (repeated court appearances, written documentation to name just 2)
But if the person you are caring for has not previously named you as POA then this is the route that has to be taken as once a lawyer determines that this person is not competent then they can not appoint a POA.
One option, and not a great one, if this person has no family and you do not feel as if you can continue to care for them then the Court will appoint a Guardian and the person will become a "Ward of the State" and the appointed Guardian will make ALL decisions regarding care.

There is help.
Have you contacted
Local Area Agency on Aging to determine if your friend would qualify for any help?
Local Senior Centers often have Social Workers that are aware of programs that might help.
There may be Day Care Programs that would give you a break as well as provide some stimulation for your friend.
Depending on the level of care that is needed your friend may qualify for Hospice. If this is the case you would have a Nurse come at least 1 time a week. A CNA that would come 2 to 3 times a week. You would also have a Social Worker that can help you find other resources. All the Supplies, Medications, Equipment that you need to care for your friend safely. And the ability to request a Volunteer that could come and give you a break. (usually a 2 to 4 hour span but they can do NO hands on care) And a great benefit of Hospice is that insurance (private, Medicare or Medicaid) will provide about a week of Respite Care each year.
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Establishing incompetence is usually done when establishing a conservativeship/guardianship. The laws regarding these are different in every state, and doing this is seldom possible as DIY: you will almost certainly need an attorney.

Further, because this process terminates most of the ward's civil rights, the court may appoint an attorney to represent the person claimed to be incompetent. The process likely will be easier if it is not contested.

As with anything done in a court of law, you must present evidence. Evidence might be psychological or psychiatric evaluations, for example.

In any case, the first step might be to ask the person you want declared incompetent whether or not that person would object to it. You'd expect anyone who is, in fact, competent to object, but sometimes people are so far out of it that they neither understand nor care- and will say so in court.

So, if you decide to proceed, your next step is to consult a qualified lawyer.

Since a conservatorship/guardianship gives the conservator/guardian near ghod-like powers over the ward, and given that financial or other abuse is not exactly unheard of here, a court will want to see solid, convincing evidence that the person truly is incompetent- and that the proposed conservator/guardian has the capacity to perform the legal duties and is unlikely to exploit or otherwise abuse the ward.

Once you're accepted as a conservator/guardian you may not renounce these duties without the permission of the court. Further, the court likely will monitor you and the ward to see that the ward is receiving all needed services and is not being exploited or otherwise abused.

To ask the obvious: are you sure you want to do this?
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