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What do you do if the behavior is not caused by dementia? My parents have the money for home health care but (mother) refuse to use it. They want each adult child (we all live out of state/country) to rotate on a monthly basis to care for them. Obviously this cannot happen as we all have families and jobs. Parents are fighting (Dad recently arrested for CDV) and right now are living separately due to court order. They are 77 and out of control. Any thoughts

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So they want all of you to give up your lives and meet all their needs for free & they can hang on to their money?
"Oh gee, sorry mom & dad.....we're not as stupid as you thought & looks like you better put that money to use after all."

Unless that is...you want to enter a rattlesnake's den.

Are you sure there's no dementia? I've been told a few times my mom has no dementia because she knows what year it is...That tells me only that she knows what year it is, not whether or not there's something wrong in her twisted little mind.

If they are out of control now, don't expect it to change anytime in the future. Please don't wish this on any of your siblings either. If one is compelled to care for them....try to talk some sense into them & discourage them from destroying their lives.
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Thanks for the sobering advice. None of us are getting involved but fear the pull of the social workers that are now involved. We have all stated we want nothing to do with them. We are lucky because they are in SC and we are in MA and the UK.
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Good. My brother was the smart one and moved out of state when he was 19. I didn't "clue in" & now I'm paying for it.
"Sobering advice" LOL. Most folks tell me I'm brutally honest. Thanks for putting it nicely. Ha

I wish you the best & hope the social workers have no authority where you are.
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