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It’s so good to hear from you, Anche? How have you been?
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You are all in my mind... I think and speak about you very often even if I do not come here.
I will try to catch up somehow and to come here more frequently.
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Burnt,

Thanks. My godmother was an interesting woman. I loved her, but I was fully aware that she had issues. My godfather, her husband was so sweet. I find it interesting that these domineering women are often married to docile men. I guess they didn’t know who they were really marrying. I think in some cases the claws come out after they are married.

My godmother didn’t have any filter, long before her Alzheimer’s disease set in. She said whatever was on her mind to anyone that was around, not caring who she offended. She never knew when to keep her opinions to herself. She didn’t get along well with the staff at her nursing home. She could be extremely rude when she was in a bad mood.

Not that I am not sad about her getting bruised in her nursing home. I was very sad about it. I never knew her to be violent when I was growing up.

Maybe she wasn’t on the right meds. I have no idea how they handle these issues in nursing homes.

I can’t imagine how exhausted the aides in nursing homes must be working with patients like my godmother. I was totally exhausted just taking care of one person in my house, my mom.
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@Need

I'm sorry that your grandmother ended up like that. How terrible.
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Burnt,

Married to Elvis? That is hysterical!

My godmother thought that her nursing home took everyone on a vacation when they were being evacuated for hurricane Katrina! She said, “Isn’t this lovely that we are taking a nice road trip!”

My mother and I were glad that her delusions from Alzheimer’s disease were preventing her from being afraid during a horrific hurricane.

Alzheimer’s disease is awful but that was one time that it worked in her favor. My poor godmother had Alzheimer’s disease and macular degeneration. She eventually went blind from her macular degeneration.

My godmother was very stylish and never let her hair go gray. She dyed it blonde throughout the years. When she went into the nursing home she wasn’t able to dye her hair anymore.

She was always outspoken and often offended people with things that she said. She could be quite opinionated and feisty at times.

It shocked me when I would visit her and see her arms covered in bruises. When I asked the aides at the nursing home about her bruises, they would tell me, “Your godmother is a fighter!”

Maybe the aides arms were bruised too from her being combative. I don’t know how common it is for residents to fight back like she did.

She would fight with the aides when they tried to help her. I suppose after she went blind she became anxious and afraid.

Towards the end of her life, she didn’t recognize any of us who visited her.

Her son (my cousin) had POA but he lived in California and only visited once or twice a year.
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@Ana

That is funny and sad at the same time. Some of the things my dementia clients would come up with over the years...

Not just the instigating, repeating incessantly, and the asinine nonsense. Like one client I had who insisted she be taken out of town to grocery shop because all the food in the city she lived in was rotten. Of course I did not indulge her in that nonsense.

Some of their tales were hilarious. I had one old girl who thought she was secretly married to Elvis Presley. We couldn't tell anyone though because it had to be a secret.
I had another who thought he was a general in the army. We just used to go along with them because it was harmless.
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Way,

I can understand how this would happen.
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Need,

When I was young and worked in a nursing home , one of the residents with dementia thought I was her daughter , because she saw me often . When her daughter came she didn’t know her. It was sad .
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Ana,

When I visited my mother in the nursing home where she went to for rehab after a fall, there was an old woman who had gray that cornered with her wheelchair daily when I walked into the building.

She thought that she was only 36 years old. She asked me to please take her to the parking lot to find her car because she had to go home to take care of her nine year old son.

The other old women in the home were tired of hearing the same stories from her and said to me, “Don’t pay any attention to Charlotte’s ramblings. She’s crazy!”

It is sad that they fabricate stories due to their dementia but there can be a humorous side as well.

It wasn’t very nice but the old ladies in the home would tell this woman, Charlotte to go look in the mirror at her gray hair to see that she wasn’t 36 years old anymore!

The staff told me that Charlotte cornered a lot of visitors and to simply walk past her.
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Ana you made my night!
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Bounce,

Hahaha 🤣! Yep, we called it ‘Free entertainment!’ Gotta laugh at the ridiculous nonsense.

My husband’s grandfather was a sweetheart. Talk about a mismatched pair! He purposely turned off his hearing aid when his wife would go on a rampage. LOL 😆

Yeah, my father was a very honest man. My mother used to say that his brother lied just to keep in practice. He could tell some stories. He was the polar opposite of my dad.

Every family has their nutcases!
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Ana,

When we listened to the fabricated stories from my husband’s grandmother, we would make the comment, ‘Fact or Fiction?’ She didn’t have any dementia. She just lied!

Some of the stories were hysterical! Some were ridiculous! Some were incredibly rude!
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Anabana

I know , ditto with my ( late) narc Mom,
(((hugs)))
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Waytomisery - plus there is no way to convince them otherwise and no point in trying. Certainly my mother’s mind has been made up about me since I was born.
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Anabanana

That’s funny.

My sister was in the hospital last week and had delirium after surgery. She also most likely has vascular dementia per MRI ( they did the MRI to see if she had a stroke , because she was off the wall ). She has to follow up with cog tests for diagnosis . But I can tell you she has it . She’s doing some of the same things my Mom did .

Anyway while she had delirium , she texted me ( with poor spelling ) that I put all the old people in homes . ( She is correct , In my family that has been left for me to do) . She went on to say that I should do something good for once to help the old people . She also told me she wants her car keys back from me . ( Her son took them )

Funny part is , this sister was the only 1 out of 4 siblings that stood up for me to take car keys away from Dad and to place my mother in AL . It’s funny how their minds work .
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I would simply like to vent. Plus it’s funny.

Some of you may have noticed a pattern - my complete inability to do anything right by my mother. Ever.

My mother (in care, near me) did not recognize us during yesterday’s visit. So we got an earful about how she is not happy with her daughter. Seems Ana is getting married again July 21st, and the wedding will be where Ana lives. Mother said she knows the bride’s parents traditionally pay but she refuses to shell out a cent unless Ana moves the wedding to the city where she (mother) believes she (mother) still lives.

We did our best to keep poker faces and redirect the conversation. But my husband now regrets not probing to learn who I am going to marry.
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There is someone I know of who has spent the majority of their life living outside of the country and now wants to return "home" to the bosom of their family (and to access our healthcare). I'm really getting tired of hearing about these people's problems and pleas for help. They have spent years preparing for this eventuality, setting up false bank accounts and mailing addresses and who knows what else, and are still trying to game the system and jump the now lengthy queues. The thing is as a citizen they've always had the option to move home and receive full healthcare coverage after only 3 months, but they seem to be so invested in this belief that they scam their way in that any advice given on how to work within the current system, and current reality of too much need and not enough resources, seems to disappear into the aether.
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Need: You're very welcome. So sweet that your mother loved roses. They are lovely.
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Bounce,

Thanks, it was nice. My mother had a special relationship with my daughters.
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Llama,

Thanks. Her birthday was on the 3rd of November.

All Saints Day is November 1st. All Saints Day (Catholic Feast Day) is heavily observed in New Orleans. The cemeteries are filled with beautiful flowers.

I love irises too. We have irises that are native to Louisiana that are very pretty.

I brought roses today. Mom loved roses.
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Need: My fav flower is an iris. So delicate. It waa your mom's birthday? I missed that. Happy heavenly birthday to her.
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Bounce,

Just bringing flowers. My mother loved flowers.
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Heading out to the cemetery in a little while. My daughters want to bring flowers.

So many beautiful flowers to choose from. I don’t have an all time favorite flower. I love all of them.
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To whoever jinxed us by dressing up like Santa and all his elves last night - this. isn't. funny. ❄️☃️🌨️
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Bounce , I’m like 90 minutes from Hershey . They do have a factory there and an amusement park . My daughter’s friend is a production planner for Twizzlers , which aren’t chocolate . The store they have is cool . They have specialty products you don’t see in the stores . I haven’t been there in many years though . They had a lame fake factory tour when I was there .
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I heard that there's a shortage of chocolate,so the price on it might go up pretty soon~ :(
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There used to be a chocolate bar called Chunky I think . Maybe that’s why they can’t call the Kit Kat chunky.

Nestle has 40% stake in Hershey . It was a joint agreement that’s been beneficial for both companies. I just looked it up .

My daughter’s best friend works for Hershey .
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cwillie , Thanks .
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Hm, after a little bit of exploring I see they are called something else in the US.... big kat I think? And they say the ingredients are different too 🤔
Oh wow, in the US it's made by Hershey's, everywhere else it's made by Nestle.
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Gotta run, grabbing a cup of coffee with my daughter and her friend. Have a happy Halloween everyone! Enjoy your candy!
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