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She has partial dementia that is getting worse. She also wakes up multiple times at night. She gets her time confused and has nightmares. I haven’t slept good for 2 months now. Please help me. Unisom doesn’t work neither does Benadryl. I don’t want to give too much either. Unisom knocks my bf out but she gets up and will have full on conversation with ppl not there. She also says some little boy sleeps in her bed and throws things at her or kicks her. All things are impossible. But I’m feeling like zombie status and I am gaining weight from lack of sleep. It’s so not healthy for me.



thank you.

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The next time she hallucinates, you can call 911 and tell them she is seeing things and that she may have an untreated UTI (which can worsen dementia symptoms) but DO NOT tell them it's about her dementia because that is not an "emergency" and they won't take her. But an untreated UTI can turn septic, which IS life threatening.

Once she is in the ER talk to the staff and tell them she is an unsafe discharge. Also request to talk to a social worker. If you are not your grandma's PoA then you don't have enough legal power to make decisions for her or get her the care she requires even when she rejects it. Make sure you tell them you're not her caregiver and you cannot keep having sleepless nights since you have a day job and there's no money to pay for care. Social services will hopefully be able to transition her directly into a facility, or maybe move her to the psych wing to get her on the right medications so that she is less agitated and not hallucinating. If she does have a UTI she will need to cooperate and take the antibiotics.

Most on this forum will unanimously tell you to NOT take her back home -- she needs more care than you can provide or afford. DO NOT believe the hospital if they promise to "help" you once she gets home... nope, they just need her out. Been there, done that. Make sure no other family member goes to get her.

This will feel awful for a while until she is stabilized and transitioned into the right level of care. Do not feel guilty... this is how dementia can be and you're doing the best you can for her with your limited resources.
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No one has just "partial dementia."
So your grandma has dementia and you've apparently not sought the advice of a doctor for what she's going through. To me it sounds like she's sundowning, and they do have medications out there for that.
And one of the worst thing anyone over 60 can take is Benadryl, as that actually has been linked to causing dementia in those over that age, so please stop giving that to her.
And I can only guess that any of the over the counter sleep aides are just as dangerous for the elderly.
PLEASE have whoever is grandmas POA(power of attorney)get her to the doctor so she can be treated with the proper medications and you can get some much needed sleep.
Your grandma is only going to get worse as her dementia progresses, so she may need to be placed in the appropriate facility where she will receive the 24/7 care she requires and you can get back to just being her granddaughter.
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Tym4Chvng3 Feb 19, 2024
You sure make a lot of assumptions. I just started and no one has told me anything I can’t even go see a doctor because she changed her insurance and she’s in the middle of an insurance switch.. so you sound really smart for assuming you know what I’ve done.
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Please get her to a doctor, preferably a psychiatrist or neurologist for evaulation of her hallucinations and a proper diagnosis

Do not try over the counter meds.

She needs prescription meds.
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Tym4Chvng3 Feb 19, 2024
I’ve tried to, but because she changed her insurance and didn’t realize what she was doing. We’re trying to get back her old insurance, but I can’t bring her in until March 1.. trust me I’m trying. No one else will take care of her but me. I’m trying my best I’m the only grand daughter that would move in. Everyone else is trying to avoid helping but can’t afford a home to put her and in and all this nonsense.
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Everyone with dementia is different, so ever problem has to be handled differently, what works for one may not work for others.
Definitely get help from doctors, different meds or something. But in the meantime I would try make as little deal of it as you can. If she sees someone or something that's not there , just brush it off, don't make a huge deal about it. I feel that when they see they are getting attention from something, it makes it all the worse. Very much like children
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lealonnie1 Feb 19, 2024
I was a child who had vicious nightmares and night terrors every single night of my life from age 5 on. I had no desire for "attention", just for the horrible torture to STOP. I think every human who's plagued by nightmares will agree, it has nothing at ALL to do with attention seeking.
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She needs an anti anxiety med.
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Your grandmother is suffering from night terrors. These can be helped with Meds. When my Mom had them I woke her up, made her open her eyes and had her go back to sleep.

As I said in ur first post, her children should be handling this. If they don't want to do the care she needs to be placed.
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pamzimmrrt Feb 19, 2024
Where is the first post?
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Bless you dear girl for being there and trying to help your Grandma.
Unfortunately it sounds like you're dealing with several complex health issues plus the added insurance dilemma. No wonder you're worn out. Do you have a physician yourself that could talk to you about being a caregiver?
I can only speak from my own experiences with my husband and like someone said ever person is different but here's what we've learned so far.
His screaming, yelling and thrashing at night is REM sleep disorder and is often seen way ahead of a dx of Lewy Body dementia. The hallucinations sometimes are an early symptom of LBD.
Hopefully when Grandma's insurance gets in place you can find a neurologist that's knowledgeable of this complex disease.
Good luck to you and your Grandma.🙏
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