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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Blondie I just read your other posts. I didn’t notice a sister in the other posts. Whose sister is this? Is she there during the day to assist or has she also moved in?
Before your post was about MIL and her hygiene.
I am afraid you will have to deal with them until you decide you have had enough and you will have to advocate for yourself. If no one listens to you, evict them. Somehow you have to get their attention. If they are doing the best they can, then take steps to get them into a facility.
Like I said, boundaries only work when two are working on it. Setting a boundary for MIL about cleanliness won't work if she's no intention of getting cleaned up.
No idea what is happening here? Who lives with whom? Who owns the house? Setting boundaries is lovely. But what do you do when they break the boundaries?
Your previous post says in-laws live with you. Have they found a place to live? Your previous posts say nothing about a sister being involved. If they are not living in your home, what type of boundaries do you think you will need for them? If they are gone, why do you have to get control of your house?
Hi Blondie, confusing question, but my guess is that your parents-in-law have moved IN, and your sister-in-law is now visiting them in your house and making her presence very much felt.
I’d tackle the sister first. Some suggestions: 1) She takes parents out of your house for visits. 2) This includes her handling doctors appointments and shopping trips with them. 3) She has a time-table for visits in your house. Perhaps one morning a week, during which she also prepares a meal for all of you, or does their washing. 4) She doesn’t make any suggestions about what care they need, unless she is prepared to do it herself. 5) When you have your head around this, you talk it through with your husband before you give sister and parents the happy news about the new rules.
If I’ve guessed wrong about the situation, perhaps you could make things a bit clearer. Yours, Margaret
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I just read your other posts. I didn’t notice a sister in the other posts. Whose sister is this? Is she there during the day to assist or has she also moved in?
Before your post was about MIL and her hygiene.
I am afraid you will have to deal with them until you decide you have had enough and you will have to advocate for yourself. If no one listens to you, evict them. Somehow you have to get their attention. If they are doing the best they can, then take steps to get them into a facility.
Who lives with whom?
Who owns the house?
Setting boundaries is lovely. But what do you do when they break the boundaries?
I’d tackle the sister first. Some suggestions:
1) She takes parents out of your house for visits.
2) This includes her handling doctors appointments and shopping trips with them.
3) She has a time-table for visits in your house. Perhaps one morning a week, during which she also prepares a meal for all of you, or does their washing.
4) She doesn’t make any suggestions about what care they need, unless she is prepared to do it herself.
5) When you have your head around this, you talk it through with your husband before you give sister and parents the happy news about the new rules.
If I’ve guessed wrong about the situation, perhaps you could make things a bit clearer.
Yours, Margaret