Mom moved in 90 on a walker and is housebound. We moved her in with us due to falls, fragility. She sits in ths family room all day coughing and watching tv. Nobody else wants to be in there with her as she coughs, asks you do to stuff for her, so we are in our bedrooms. I don't want to put her in a nursing home but I'd like my house back. Please help.
I know its hard being the caregiver and also giving up parts of your house. Is there another part of the house that could be developed into a family space? I'm not sure if the basement is developed or maybe an empty bedroom upstairs could be converted into a family room.
I know you don't want to consider a nursing home, but maybe that is something to start thinking about. It is hard on the younger generation when living with an elderly parent. Trying to find a compromise is tough. I hope you can find an option that works for your family.
Is it the cough that is a bother/concern, or simply her presence?
She's in the "family room". Is there a living room or parlor in addition? Who is staying in their Room? Kids? Teenagers? Adults? Everyone? What was your family's habit before Gram moved In? What would you LIKE your family home/time to look/feel like?
So, is the cough what is Bothersome? Is it interrupting the TY viewing/music Listening? And about TV, is there discussion of what gets watched that is fair?
If this is going to work, everyone has to do some adjusting, including Grandma.
Hey, I grew up as a young kid and teen with my grandmother living with us. I've lived this and know what a toll it can take on family life, growing kids, my parents's marriage and the tone of the home.
Think and talk this out.
Your Mom probably doesn't want to be alone in her own room, she wants company like it was back in the olden days when everyone sat around the kitchen table to talk. Now, people vanish to their own rooms due to social media and to watch TV shows that probably wouldn't interest an elder. Time to compromise to make everyone happy.
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