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Last December my husband was diagnosed with beginning stages dementia. After all testing was complete the dr recommended no driving since one area affected is his spatial judgment/relations. Although upset, he did what he was asked. He is currently on the patch and NamendaXR. He wasn't much of a doer before, but he did get out and enjoy life. He would golf, go for a bike ride, enjoy traveling or going out for dinner, etc. Now, he has become a complete couch potato. There is no motivation, ambition whatsoever. Everything and anything I suggest, I get a "no." Plans are made, then he cancels or changes his mind. There is a 6 year age difference between us, he will be 67 in 2 weeks, I am 61. Although we are just at the beginning stages of this disease, my life has changed drastically. I know there is a long road ahead, but his disinterest in anything and everything, except TV is starrting too soon. We have a drs appt for his yearly evaluation in 3 weeks. I am mentioning all this to the drs., looks like depression to me. Thoughts please for I really do not know what to do by his apathy. Thank you.

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With any type of medical issue some people just don't like leaving the house and being around other people... it's called agoraphobia. One wants the safety of the cocoon called home.

Since hubby liked golf and bike riding at one time, would he enjoy walking/hiring? Is that something comfortable for you, too? If there are any nice quiet parks nearby he might like that if the parks aren't filled with people. Take him by the hand, tell him to get comfortable shoes, as YOU want to go for a walk but need him to come with you. Walking usually makes one feel better :)

I know it won't be easy, but worth a try. Have him bring a camera, maybe he will develop a new hobby taking pictures.
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Sounds like depression to me, too. Do discuss this with the doctor.

My husband discovered a golfing league sponsored by a local rehab center, for persons with handicaps. It allowed as much time as people needed. He loved it. He also joined a senior bowling league, who kind of adopted him and looked out for his needs. It was awesome.

Your husband simply won't be able to do things at the level he used to. But that doesn't mean he can't do anything! I hope you can encourage some activity. Some with you -- going out to lunch at non-peak times, and some without you, such bowling with others.

But if he is depressed no amount of encouragement or motivating techniques can overcome the chemical imbalance. (I have major depressive disorder and I speak from experience!) Fortunately depression is treatable, but first it has to be diagnosed.

(My husband took anti-depressants, by the way.)
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This is a real loss for you of a big part of your marriage! I really identify just because my hubby is nearly 9 years older and physically cannot do much of anything, and all the things I love outside of work are either physically active or solo in nature. He is not as sharp or open minded as he used to be either. We got him an adult trike to ride and have not done it yet, it's kind of my last hope of seeing him regain a little strength and fitness.
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What's in motion stays in motion - we all get lethargic from doing nothing so I hope the doctor can offer some suggestions - it is so much more difficult to get outside for a walk in the wintertime but even if for 15 minutes try to get him moving - tell him the cable is out and turn the tv off for awhile

There's a 69 year old man at mom's memory care who used to run marathons and he walks tirelessly in the front yard and his wife brought a stationary bike for him to use -

I try to keep my 93 year old mom moving as much as possible but it's a challenge
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Thank you for your thoughts. The sad part is he is physically able to do everything at this point in time. Walking, biking, golfing, etc are not a problem. He does lift weights for about 10 minutes daily, that is it. It is not that he cannot do those things at this point in time, it is that he "will not" do them. I never thought I would experience this sort of apathy so early on, we have a very long road ahead. When I get upset and we talk, there is some motivation. He knows he has to keep active, but he goes right back to square one. It is so upsetting to me to see this lack of interest in anything.
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FYI....no winter here, I am in Florida. 😎 Can't blame things on the weather....
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