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My oldest brother and POA e-mailed my other brother and myself. He told us that where she is, it's going to cost $5500/month for her. Can someone tell me how it can be paid and us having money left over in her account? We can't use the Long Term Care policy that she has because it isn't qualified. We needed to get her out of the apartment because of her memory issues. I still feel that she has a UTI but haven't heard the results of it yet. Still feel that they didn't do it.


A lady at work told me that they would take her social security and something else, which I can't remember. Then the balance we would have to pay. But that is part of her income.

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It's so expensive, it's just crazy! Once my dad needed a lot of care, his facility cost double his income and he had no savings. Luckily, my siblings and I were able to pitch in and help pay while I applied for the VA aid and attendance program. It was a god send! But if your Mom doesn't qualify for that and paying the $5500 is a hardship, then you might need to consider moving her to a nursing home and trying to get medicaid. Some states have a medicaid waiver for Assisted Living, but you have to agree to live where they want you to go (where there is an opining). Maybe you could also look for another facility that cost a little less, the range of cost is great. Good luck to you.
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Judy79 Jul 2019
There is a place that I thought of that is smaller and older.  But her current doctor sees the patients there and she could still be her doctor.  I tell you, my brother, who is the financial poa, lives and learns.  And so do I.  Not easy taking care of your aging parent. Especially when this comes unannounced.
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I'm confused when you say the LTC insurance policy "isn't qualified." Is it possible that your mother does not qualify right now based on her current needs or that the type of facility you are loking at doesn't provide the services required by the LTC policy to pay? Long term care insurance policies are generally structured so that they will start to pay for care if someone if certified by a medical professional as needing assistance with two or more ADLs (activities of daily living): transferring, eating, bathing, dressing, toileting and continence, or the person requires substantial supervision due to significant cognitive impairment.
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Judy79 Jul 2019
If I remember right, where my mom is now, they aren't licensed.  Or maybe it's another word.  They are a new location but that shouldn't matter, right?  There is a place that my mom and I looked at before at first.  They a licensed facility.  Smaller and older.  My brother wanted newer and bigger.  We just had to move her to a place that can care for her due to her dementia.  Hasn't gotten that bad yet.  She has mild unspecified dementia.  She is 88.  She was told that it can stay even for a while then eventually go downhill.  She seems a little better where she is now.  Guess my brother didn't realize that it's that expensive to live at those places.  We are all learning.
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Those can’t afford AL on their own may be eligible for financial assistance through Medicaid. If your mom is in Indiana, there is a Medicaid waiver program that will help with SOME of the costs associated with assisted living. ALL of her income will go to the assisted living facility and she’ll get a small personal needs allowance ($60 a month is the average). If she is a veteran or her husband is/was a veteran, she may be eligible for V.A. aid and attendance as well. She’ll have to use all of her assets to pay for her care.
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Judy79 Jul 2019
Mom gets too much income to qualify for Medicaid. I found that out. And not a VA.  My brother is really learning about this. Mom has been widowed for 23 years. None of us wish this on her. Just think that she might have a uti but haven't found out the results of her urine sample yet.
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I have a couple of questions...What do you mean about the LTA not being qualified? She does not qualify for Medicaid? If she doesn't qualify for Medicaid, then yes, she will have to pay for this with her own money, her SS will not be taken from her, she will just use it towards her MC rent. My step father and his wife will be paying 6K per month, they do not qualify for Medicaid at this time, he will paying for it out of his investments and their SS and pension. The net out of pocket after those things will be around 3K a month.
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worriedinCali Jul 2019
I’m curious about the LTC thing too because I thought a non-qualified LTC policy meant that it’s not tax deductible? That wouldn’t be a reason she can’t use it. Maybe the LTC doesn’t cover assisted living?
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How is it that your brother is "learning" about the costs of memory care? That doesn't make sense to me. The costs are known up front, your mom's income is known up front, and the math is done from there....she can either afford it or she cannot. My mother is charged $6400 a month in Memory Care. $1000 She gets in SSI, $1209 she gets in VA Spousal Aid and Attendance, and the remainder of $4200+ comes from her savings. If your mother has a long term care insurance policy, she should be living somewhere where she can use it, otherwise, what was the purpose of paying all that money for it??? I sure wish my folks had purchased LTC insurance because a few hundred grand has already been spent over the last 5 years and the savings account is running out.
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$5500 sounds about right for Memory care...it was $5000 when I investigated locally 3 years ago. I would strongly suggest you and your brother understand the details of that LTC policy as it may be your savior. Memory care is typically self paid from savings, SS, pension, and sometimes even desperate kids kicking in the balance. That LTC policy may pay for a lot of the cost, depending on its benefits. It’s what your Mom paid for for years, and probably wasn’t cheap so take advantage of it, even if means moving her to a different accredited facility. You may be leaving money on the table.
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Judy79 Jul 2019
I know that it would pay for assisted living but not sure about the memory care IF it does, the current cost of memory care is $178/day. If the LTC is approved, then they would pay $110/day for 4 years. She got this policy in 2000. Don't think that my brother had this location send the LTC more information. The LTC policy said the reason why they won't pay for it is because they aren't licensed. But according to the man that I talked to, the place is approved by the atty general with the state. Help me understand one thing, what do you mean by "leaving money on the table"?
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